Sunday, September 21, 2008
Moments & the Absence of Tears
I should be deep in slumber....but I have a desire to write before I forget. I want to record forever my little moments with my youngest son, Tyler. It was several days ago, after I had showered and was standing naked in my room (doing what? I don't remember) when Tyler (2 1/2) started hitting my bum cheeks. He said in his inquisitive voice, "Mommy, what is this?". I was distracted and he repeated this several times. I finally realized he was asking me what my bum cheeks were and so I told him, "Mommy's bum cheeks." His response was simple, "It's gross mom, it's gross."
Whenever I get irritated with the boys they become "Sheldon's sons." This was one of those moments when my 2 1/2 year old actually made me feel bad. I was irritated. When Sheldon arrived home I said, "Shel, you need to pop your son's bottom." I recounted to Sheldon my lovely conversation with Tyler. Another day with the boys is all I can say....
Tonight Tyler redeemed himself. Tyler was being naughty and had come out of his bed to snuggle with daddy on the couch after I had put him down. I came downstairs in a long, flowing piece of lingerie (lingerie, not negligee mind you). Tyler saw me and I saw him. He asked me to come and sit by him on the couch. After I snuggled up next to him he said, "Mom, you're a princess. What are you doing princess?" Sweeeeet! I'm a princess folks! Another day with the boys....
Next item of thought...Cameron's first day of preschool. Most mom's cry. Here is my story: The bus pulls up in front of our house. I watch Cameron run to the bus...he doesn't look back. I hold the video camera and record his back as he gets on the bus. I wave. The bus rolls down the road. Tyler runs down the hill crying because he wants to go too. I retrieve Tyler and spend the next hour dancing around my house feeling as if a thousand pounds have been lifted off my shoulders. To relinquish my parental responsibility over Cameron for a few hours had an absolutely euphoric affect upon me. I laughed and danced.
I have since felt a little guilty about my response to Cameron's first day of school. Where are the tears? This is just another day with my boys...
If you know me, then you know that I have a deep and profound love for my boys. If you know my family, then you know that Cameron has been high-maintenance since day one and you wouldn't judge the situation with any amount of harshness.
(P.S. The euporia only lasted one day. Now I miss him every day.)
Posted by Marguerite Jensen